Saturday has drawn to an end and I spent the last hour of it packing my room (again).
Not out of stress this time (though I am kinda stressed), just that the war zone state it was in makes it impossible to do work.

Had a long meeting with a very dedicated group of people!
Thank you Kiap, Yiyou, Cong, Puay (though you are far away) and Xinyi for sharing your insights too. Two weeks, 80 pages, *weak smile.

While packing, I realise my paperfreak tendencies got a lot more serious, I dug out so many random paper that I kept 'cause the texture is cool. I am running out of space to store them and the mountain of prints/postcards/brochures I collect from the floors everywhere. I also realise I am hopeless at household chores. I rather crawl around the floor sticking up hair and dust with masking tape than to use a broom. ._.

Like that how to go overseas...

I think I am at perhaps the most exciting period of my life yet,
I am doing what I love in school, and doors to great things are opening.

And all of our parents
They're getting older
I wonder if they've wished for anything better
While in their memories
Tiny tragedies
-John Mayer's No Such thing

These words always make me feel a bit melancholic.
I guess I am the luckiest one at home, doing what I like to do, been to exchange programmes and trips abroad, these things are unheard of when my sisters were in school.
And I guess this will just continue. My little cousin went to Europe for exchange in primary school. I was... playing lego when I was his age.

I have always been idealistic since young, thinking people do get their dreams realised and do what they love to do for a living. As I get older (and increasingly cynical), my eyes are opened and I realise this is totally not the case. This is why we have naggy cab drivers, sulky canteen aunties and teachers who gossip about their students in Macdonalds.

I wonder if I will end up doing Design next time even,
you know, unpredictability.

And I really don't want to go to NTU...
maybe I will fly to get a degree next time...
I kind of want to see the world, though sometimes I feel a bit aiya.. for my siblings and the thought of leaving my not-very-young parents are kinda.. :/
(This sounds minor, but the thought of going overseas with a whole new ground to take photos is a very huge motivating factor for me)
We'll see, we'll see.

*

Lincoln Brewster, The power of Your Name

Surely children were not made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your kingdom come

Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what you saw

Let Your kingdom come
Here in my heart

I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet

I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

Surely life wasn't made to forget
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without action is dead

Let Your kingdom come
Lord break this heart

Jesus Your name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your name
Holds everything I need